My Year in Books

I read 12 books this year. It doesn't sound like a lot, and I know it's not. I used to read nearly 12 books a semester for one English course. Life is very different now and the demands on my time are different. I was pretty intentional about the books I read. They're not all spectacular books, but there was a reason, whether random or logical, why I chose to read them. So in the order I read them, here they are:

1-5. The Selection Series: The Selection, The Elite, The One, The Heir, The Crown - Kiera Cass

I actually came across these books from the scholastic website. I was cross referencing some reading levels of books and came across this series. I did some searching online to see what the premise of them was. It sounded interesting enough to be some light entertainment reading so I started. Perhaps it was the girly girl inside of me, but I was pretty hooked. Before I knew it, I'd finished the three books in the first series as well as the two books in the second in about two months. They're described as Hunger Games meets The Bachelor. That's accurate. 

6. The Pearl - Steinbeck

In 9th grade English, we were offered extra credit at the end of the year if we wanted to improve our grades for the last six weeks. Our extra credit was to read this book and write an essay after reflecting on...a theme(?) within the book. I can't remember the topic anymore, but that's what remains in my memory. Being a teenager, I didn't read the complete book, looked up some cliff notes, and wrote an essay that was probably really bad. I don't remember if I got the extra credit or not. 

Over 15 years later, I still remember this, and I decided to read it again. And I did. I read the whole book and I was left stunned. Do not underestimate this book by its "low" reading level or the length of the book. It is packed with thought provoking themes and "mind games." I found the ending quite creepy as an adult.

This is one of those books I would say I'm glad I read, but I don't think I could ever bring myself to read it again. 

7. The One Thing You'd Save - Linda Sue Park

This book caught my eye at the library. I was with my children looking at books in the children's section when I saw this book propped up on top of the shelves. The title intrigued me and I checked it out for myself to read. 

This book is probably written for anywhere from a 2nd-4th grade reading level depending on how advanced a student is. I love the emphasis on perspective in this book. Something important to one person may not seem important to someone else. It's the start of empathy. 

8. The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo - Taylor Jenkins Reid

One of my students mentioned to me in a lesson that she had borrowed this book from a friend to read. I'd heard of the title before but hadn't read the book. Out of curiosity, I read it myself. It was interesting, but had my student not mentioned it to me, I would have probably never thought to pick it up and read it myself. 

9. One Time - Sharon Creech 

I have loved Sharon Creech's books since I was in grade school. My all time favorite book is still Walk Two Moons. I've already written about why I love that book. I saw she had published this book rather recently so I wanted to read it and see what kind of impression it would leave on me. It was okay. I honestly didn't remember what the book was about since I read it almost six months ago. After a quick search online to refresh my memory, the vague plot line came back to me. Another one of those books being a nice read but not special. 

10. Boundaries - Henry Cloud and John Townsend 

I remember hearing about this book in college. A few people I knew were reading it or had read it. I didn't think much about it at the time. This summer, one of my friends told me she was reading it. I decided to read it as well and it turned out to be a great read. Since reading this book, I think I've found a lot of freedom in the way I live my life and make decisions. Much of this book seems like common sense. However, having it explained and written out gives it new perspective. Not only has this book helped me feel more in control of my life, but I feel like I can better manage my business and make decisions. I'm definitely a feelings-oriented person, but reading this book has helped me to see situations more logically and remove some of the feelings. 

There are a couple ideas within the book I don't agree with 100%, but the general premise of the book I think is helpful to understand the decisions we make, we should make, and why we make them. It is based on Biblical teachings so if you don't share perspective with me there, I can't fully recommend this book to you. 

11. Crying in H Mart - Michelle Zauner 

I read this book because I saw one friend post about it on Facebook. I'd heard about it and seen it elsewhere, but I didn't choose to read it until I saw my friend's post.  Honestly, it hit me differently than I thought it would from seeing the hype about this book. Before reading it, I think I thought I would relate more to her because we had experienced similar upbringings and experiences. After reading it, I think it made me realize even more what I never was able to experience: I never got to be an adult next to my mother. 

I could write a whole other blog solely on this, so I'll leave it be for now.

12. It Ends With Us - Colleen Hoover

This book probably ended up on many people's reading lists for 2022 even though it was published six years ago. That's the power of social media. I saw it recommended on a few other people's posts and thought I'd read it to see what the hype was. It's not your typical romance novel which I liked, and although the book is fiction, it is based off non-fiction people. 

This was one of those books for me where I was sad when it was over. I spent the whole book getting to know these characters and living their lives through a third-party lens, and then when the book ends, everything ends. It's that feeling of breaking up with someone except it's people in a book. I wanted to keep following along and seeing what would happen to them, but I can't because the book ended. 

And that's why authors write sequels. The sequel actually came out this year, but I can't justify purchasing books for fun reading like this, so as of today, I am still on the library waitlist for this book. It'll probably end up on next year's book list. :)

Any recommendations for next year? I don't plan these in advance. This list just made itself as the year passed. Always open to suggestions!

The Scars We Carry

My friend gave my daughter a pair of glittery shoes her daughters had outgrown when we were over for a playdate a while back. My daughter instantly loved them and wanted to wear them everywhere. When we got home, she wore them inside the house for the longest time. Then she started wearing them out and she'd wear them with pants, with dresses, with socks on her feet, barefoot. She wore them a lot.

The shoes have since lost their velcro stickiness and the little embellishments are coming off the toes, but she wore them a lot and she loved them a lot. 

After my friend gave my daughter the shoes and the kids were playing, I told my friend about my own shoe story because I had once wanted a similar pair. When I was younger, my dad took me shoe shopping. I was looking for a pair of dress shoes to wear to piano competitions and performances. Although not as fast as most, my feet were still growing and I needed new shoes periodically with my 1-2 piano competitions every year and seasonal recitals. At the store, I found a pair of shoes I liked but they didn't have my size in stock. I ended up purchasing a different pair of shoes.

Another time when all of us went shopping, I somehow ended up back in the shoe section to browse. They had the shoe I wanted and in my size. My dad said I could have them since they weren't here last time we came. He put them in the cart and we met up with my mom and my brother. When she saw the shoes in the cart, she started asking questions and getting angry. Why were we buying those shoes? Why did I need them? 

My dad responded by telling her they were the ones I wanted last time but they didn't have my size. Now they had my size, he was going to buy them. Then, they started arguing in the middle of an aisle at the store. My mom would take the shoes and put them on the shelf to the side. My dad took the shoes and put them back in the cart. My brother and I stood awkwardly to the side, not knowing what to do. 

I'm sure other people in the store were hearing and seeing what was happening. In my memory of the event, I vaguely see a person or two behind them as they notice the commotion in the aisle and walk away. Whether or not that is my memory being changed or if it actually happened, I will never know. 

In my head, I remember just removing the box of shoes from the cart myself and setting them aside on a nearby shelf. I remember saying to them I didn't want the shoes anymore just so they'd stop fighting in the middle of the store. I did not get the shoes. I had many pairs of beautiful shoes as I grew up, but none were the pink glittery flats I had eyed as a child and wanted at one point in my life. 

Not the exact ones, but something very similar. 

As parents, we will always shape our children to some degree to become versions of ourselves. Our children have the freedom to take what they want and leave the rest as they grow up and become individuals themselves, but the influence is undoubtedly there. Since then, I've found my own truth in the situation; my mother didn't like the shoes. She didn't like the way they looked, and she didn't want to buy them for me. 

Being a parent myself, I've had to remind myself of both spectrums. I do not buy my children everything they want. But I do think about their requests and sometimes, they get a random surprise or toy just because for absolutely no reason. I hope my children do not have the same scars I do when they grow up. 

I need to write this story into my daughter's journal. I want her to remember the auntie who gave her the glitter shoes she loved as a child. And I want her to remember fondly the joy she had when she wore those shoes. And maybe, someday, she will tell her stories to her own children. 

I got to watch my daughter’s face light up the way mine would have. It’s a different kind of joy. 

*sidenote: my daughter watched me cry as I wrote this blog. she didn't say anything. but part of me is so curious if/what she will remember from this moment*

The Fuzzy Yellow Diary

When I was in 2nd grade, I asked my mother for a fuzzy yellow diary from a school book order. She actually bought it for me.

I started writing in it when I was around nine years old. I wrote almost daily entries about what happened during my day. A lot of it was simple factual things. Sometimes, I would insert a little bit of opinion.

October 19, 1999: I got a 100 on my communities test and on my simple machines test.

So I was a pretty good student in 3rd grade....

December 13, 1999: I got a 67 for social studies.

...or not. 

December 30, 1999: Yesterday, I got a vase, a decoration, and a book of brainteasers.

I still have this vase, decoration, and probably the book of brainteasers although that one is not at my house. 

January 7, 2000: We get to use the internet today in PACE.

The internet must have been a very exciting thing in the year 2000.

January 18, 2000: Today I got to make kaleidoscopes [sic]. I also got to make a gallon guy. Tomorrow I am having a test.

Who remembers making gallon guys in school? Anybody? I learned my volume measurement equivalents from that. I can still picture it in my head. Counting all those cup fingers....

January 22, 2000: Today I did not have to go to Chinese school. That is good because...I can play with my doll house. I love my KALEIDOSCOPE. 

This kaleidoscope. I still remember it too. Made it out of a Pringle's can and an applesauce cup. My PACE teacher provided the mirrors to go inside and drilled the hole in the bottom of the can. I put little fake gems in mine. It made for a really pretty kaleidoscope. We wrapped the outside in a tessellation print we made on the computer. Mine was matted on pink construction paper. Is it strange I can remember all this in detail? Also, if you'd asked me how to spell kaleidoscope right off the bat today, there's a 99% chance I would not have spelled it right. Good for me for spelling it right in my diary as a nine year-old.

January 25, 2000: Today I went to PACE. It was really boring because we had to go on the internet. I want to shred those bad papers. 

Oops. The internet got boring again. Also, the extent of how bad those papers were was probably only to evade a scolding from my mom. They don't hold a candle to the "bad papers" in today's news. 😐 

Can we just take a minute to admire my cursive as a 9/10 year old? 

It's amazing looking back and reading these diary entries and being able to know exactly what I was referring to in them. Since this diary, I've kept 20 complete years of diary entries and it is still a habit I continue to this day. When friends used to come over to hang out during high school, they'd joke about finding my diary and reading it. I was never fearful of them finding my diary. It was the other journals and notebooks I wrote. My diary was just a summary of the day's events. 

This year, I stumbled across the exact same diary I had received as a grade-schooler on a website for sale. I bought it. I'm planning on saving it for my daughter when she's a little bit older, can write cohesively, and see if she wants to pen down some of her own thoughts. It's not the same color as mine, but the overall style is the same. Ironically, when I google "fuzzy yellow diary" I cannot find this one on any of the large major retailers, so it was kind of a stroke of luck to find it elsewhere. 

If you know my daughter, don't tell her about this. 🙊 I haven't chosen when to surprise her with it, but it won't be for a long while. 

The Present

It's been a while since I chose to allot time to sit down and blog. Things have happened. There are stories in my head I both want to tell and can tell. But lately, it's just been about living life a day at a time with my kids.

With all the rain lately, my kids have wanted to go outside and walk with their new umbrellas. I told them the umbrellas were not toys and they could not walk around inside the house waving them about. I have learned from my own experience that umbrellas will break faster than you can use them in the rain if they are played with indoors like toys.

These are their butterfly umbrellas from the Butterfly Palace in Branson. My daughter was the first one who wanted an umbrella. Ironically, when we checked the price on Amazon for one with the same design, the Butterfly Palace actually sold it for a lower price. We decided to get her one...and of course my son wanted one, too. We humored him this time, also because we were on vacation. As long as they listen to me and follow directions, these umbrellas should last a while....let's hope. 😬

My daughter loves collecting things on her walks. She came home with this array of colorful leaves one afternoon. She really has a keen eye for unique/pretty things. Maybe one day she'll become a designer. Although...when I showed her our photo book from our house renovations, she said to me, "I want the house to look like that [old] again!" This little designer needs a bit more practice...

This past weekend we took the kids to Scheel's for the first time. They really enjoyed the outdoor statues before even stepping foot inside the store. 

My daughter thought he was Santa and kept calling him so. I corrected her multiple times he was Abraham Lincoln, but she didn't process any of that. The store was pretty fun. Fish tanks, a wildlife diorama, candy shop, and of course, the Ferris wheel. Not a bad outing for the morning. 

We went out for lunch after at one of our favorite pho restaurants. It was a special treat since we are rarely on the other side of town as an entire family of four. My son however, wanted to slide down into the seat more than he wanted to eat his lunch. I always thought I'd be the parent who would discipline and have my child sit up nicely on the seat and eat his/her lunch.

He did end up completely under the table at one point....

I actually don't do that much. I'm the parent who would rather enjoy my lunch in peace and let my kids do their thing. As long as they're not wasting the food and splaying it all over the table and seats, I'll let them be. Eventually, he sat back up and finished most of his lunch upright. If it's one thing I learned, kids with a good temperament will eventually do what they're supposed to do when they're ready to do it. Otherwise...I shouldn't waste my breath. 

Anyone else have wiggly two year olds who end up underneath the table at restaurants? 

Life is a lot of work right now. But it's also a lot of fun. ☺